Some remarkable things I suspect are true of nearly all adults:
1) We each hold some beliefs that are almost totally non-responsive to evidence involving some combination of our identity (who we are), our group, the nature of reality (e.g., God), or the nature of what’s good.
Examples:
• Many have an unshakable belief that they are good even as they harm the world (or believe they’re insufficient even though they’re altruistic and productive)
• Most have an unshakable belief that their in-group is good and any group opposing their group is bad
2) We assume that other people’s internal experiences are more similar to our internal experiences than they really are. Consequently, we tend to predict they’ll behave more like us than they really will.
Example:
• You’re an anxious person who avoids situations you’re afraid of, so you predict other people will be more afraid of similar situations than they really will be and that they’ll be more avoidant than they really will be
3) Emotions alter our behaviors and thoughts (increasing the likelihood of some behaviors and thoughts, decreasing the likelihood of others) in emotion-dependent ways.
Examples:
• Physical disgust increases the chance of backing away and reduces the chance of eating soon
• Feelings of depression increase the chance of thinking thoughts about situations being hopeless or actions being pointless
4) How good or bad we feel about something happening depends on the difference between our expectations about what will happen and the reality of what actually happened.
Examples:
• If you think someone with a gun is about to shoot, but instead, they take your wallet and run, you might feel relief (whereas normally wallet theft would be highly distressing)
• If you expect to make $300k on a deal, you might feel bad if you “only” get $200k
5) We have multiple “drives” encoded in our brains that want different things (e.g., they have different values or goals), and these often come into conflict. Our behavior is influenced by which drives are activated and how strongly each is activated.
Examples:
• If we smell delicious popcorn right in front of us, most of us will eat it, whereas if it’s a few feet away and we can’t smell it, we’re less likely to
• If we’re exhausted but also slightly hungry, we may delay making food until we are more hungry or less tired
6) We are influenced by the behavioral norms and patterns demonstrated by the people around us, especially when they are people who we identify as being part of our group or similar to us.
Example:
• If it’s common to dress or talk a certain way in a place we move to, it will increase the chance we start to dress and talk similarly
This piece was first written on October 20, 2023, and first appeared on my website on February 7, 2024.
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