Seven simple but effective methods for improving your connection with others

March 15, 2024

Here are some of the most useful simple methods I've adopted for improving my connection with others (though I still have room for improvement): 1) When you like someone, greet them warmly, demonstrating with your face and body language that you like them. 2) Try your best to channel "interested attention" in conversations - where you give the other person your total focus while paying very close attention to what they are saying (and how they are saying it) and starting with the prem...

Why do some people oppose Roe v. Wade?

June 27, 2022

"March for Life," 2020 (photo in public domain)

Why do some people oppose Roe v. Wade? I tried to figure it out by reviewing the responses to a series of open-ended and multiple-choice questions answered by 49 people in the U.S. who say they're "very happy" that Roe v. Wade was overturned. Here is what they said. I posed the following open-ended questions: 1. "What are your views on abortion?" 2. "If you oppose abortion, why do you oppose it?" 3. "Under what circumstances do you think it should be legal to get one?" The...

Productive Disagreements – An Interactive Event Format

June 25, 2017

I ran a "Productive Disagreements" event last night, a new interactive format I've been working on where attendees practice structured disagreements on controversial topics in order to learn from each other and get experience accurately modeling other people's perspectives. Here are the materials, in case you want to run an event like this or just learn about the format: Part 1: Brief presentation about why disagreements are so often unproductive 1. You want to "win" more than you want...

The Stories Democrats and Republicans Don’t Agree On

January 20, 2017

In efforts to encourage understanding and openness on Inauguration Day, we wrote a pair of simple, short essays. One is designed to capture the views of the majority of Clinton supporters, the other, the views of the majority of Trump supporters. We had 80 supporters from each group read the corresponding essay and rate whether they agreed or disagreed with each sentence, and whether they agreed with the essay overall. After adjustments based on the feedback we received, we published the two...

The Nine Causes of Disagreement

December 21, 2011

There are an incredible range of subjects that people disagree about, but only a small number of core reasons that people disagree. When we encounter complex and difficult to resolve disputes, it can be helpful to break them down in terms of these reasons. This process can help give us insight into what is preventing a consensus from being reached. Disagreements can be caused by: 1. Facts. People have access to different information. One person has studied physics, another hasn't. One has spen...

Your Beliefs as a Temple

September 27, 2011

Your beliefs form something like a temple. The temple has many columns, rooms, and towers. The columns are facts and reasons that support the rooms. The rooms of the temple represent your major beliefs. The towers correspond to beliefs that build on each other. For example, you have rooms corresponding to aspects of your moral philosophy. On top of these rooms, supported by your moral philosophy, are rooms corresponding to your political philosophy. On top of these are still other rooms, corr...

What’s So Special About Your Own Beliefs?

July 30, 2011

Suppose that Tom and Sally have a disagreement over a factual question (as opposed to one of values or preferences). She claims that the argument he is making has errors or is unconvincing, but Tom feels the same way about her argument. They debate the question for an hour, but afterwords are still each adamantly convinced that his or her own reasoning is sound while the other person's is flawed. In this instance, is each person really more justified believing in his or her own belief than he or...